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Thornless Rose

February 5, 2019


Rose has Endometriosis (obviously), which has definitely complicated our relationship at times. I’m writing this to give a bit more context as to how our relationship has stayed so strong, and to help others struggling with their partner’s Endometriosis. 


My name is Marco Brons. I’m 18 years old, and I’m Rose’s boyfriend. And holy balls am I lucky to be her boyfriend, because I couldn’t wish for anyone better. I’m Autistic and Chronically Depressed, and despite my own problems, I gladly help Rose with hers just like she helps me with mine.


I met Rose about 3/4 years back on some shitty online card game. The environment in that community was unbelievably toxic, so you can see how Rose and I were pretty much at some of the lowest points in our lives when we met. At the time, neither of us knew she had Endo. She was, however, pretty needy at times. I didn’t mind, but it was something peculiar at the time. In the year we spent on that game, we were met with plenty of internet drama. Fortunately, we’ve moved past that. That’s something very important in any relationship. Whether your significant other has something holding them back or not: Keep being supportive. NEVER give up. I love Rose with all of my heart. I specifically call her Rose, because she dislikes the name Celestia. I asked why, she answered, and I accepted that. We’ve both matured heavily for our age. 


Once Rose told me about Endo, I admittedly freaked out. “Oh sweet baby Jesus, what the flying fuck do I do?!” was my first thought. What did it mean? I said “What is Endometriosis? Did I even spell it correctly? How is this going to affect us?” I remember telling myself that it was a bad joke. She explained what it meant. We both pretty much had a panic attack at the time, but we calmed down after that. From that point on, her behaviour changed drastically. It was as if she was constantly on her period: Moody, over-emotional, confusing and needy. Admittedly, she technically IS constantly on her period because of her Endo, which I now understand. But the years that followed were confusing for me. I didn’t understand what the problem really was, how I had to act and how to help her. So, I did it in the only way I knew how: by supporting her when she needed it. As a partner, our and their struggles are going to be mentally and emotionally draining. Not that Endometriosis directly affects your mental state, but it’s a consequence. Someone with Endo might feel like a burden. 


As one partner to another, I IMPLORE YOU to NEVER blame them for how they feel. They struggle SO HARD with their pain, and they will begin to doubt themselves. At one point, Rose told me to find someone else who wasn’t “so useless” instead of staying with her. I told her she was crazy for considering it, and that I would never leave her side even if she tried to beat my face in with a damn baseball bat. (Rose, it’s a metaphor. Do NOT hit me with a baseball bat pls. Or any other large blunt and/or sharp object for that matter. Love you!) 


Your significant other will never feel as if they’re enough. And that’s something you’re going to have to accept at times. There will be moments where you’ll want to cry, where you’ll want to break down onto the floor in pain and scream at them for thinking about themselves in such a negative light. *THAT. IS. OKAY.* I felt the same way. If you ever need a break, just to regain your composure when you’re tired, then you should take that break. Explain to them that you feel a bit weak, that you need a bit to regain your energy. It will be okay. You and your significant other are SO unbelievably strong. So much stronger than you think. It probably sounds dumb, coming from a stranger. But every single time you show how much you love them, they will remember it. Caring and loving them is everything they want.  As her father beautifully explained it: Endometriosis is like being hit in th